Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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