somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Randomize
