Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
dude i'm inner monologue high
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Randomize
