so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
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