hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Randomize
