Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Randomize