Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
So apparently I’m into choking now
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