I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
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