They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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