shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
Non-Jews are for practice
I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Randomize
