Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
