no, he came in my armpit
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
