yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
