remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
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