AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical�
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
