I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Randomize
