i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
