Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
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