It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
