there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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