i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
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