i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
