Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
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