I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize