Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Randomize
