I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
People in love make me want to vomit
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize