I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
