Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
