I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
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