Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
