Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
