You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Randomize
