He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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