And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Lo siento on account of my penis...
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
