i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
did i walk over a car last night?
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
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