I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Randomize
