Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
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