I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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