whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
