Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I have surprise drugs for everyone
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
