just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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