it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
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