honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
