Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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