I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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