So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
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