Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
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