If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
