he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
