I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
it's not cheating when I paid for it
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Randomize
